


Little Bird

by 37054ljH



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Autism, Autism Spectrum, Autistic Reader, Blood and Gore, Canon-Typical Violence, Dominant Kaneki, F/M, Female Reader, Meltdown, Mild Language, Romance, Sexual Content, Submissive Reader, Torture, Vaginal Sex, human reader, sex scene, three-shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 06:31:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19824472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/37054ljH/pseuds/37054ljH
Summary: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.





	1. The Girl With an Unquiet Mind

It was hard not being normal, but you were able to live with it.

After all, being different just means you got to be normal with them. Them being the ghouls of Anteiku.

Unlike many people, you were aware of the existence of ghouls from a young age, especially after you saw one hunt a human. You weren't frightened at all, which would cause people to question your sanity, but for some reason you didn't care.

Ghouls couldn't eat anything else. They were like wildlife and even humans, who always have to hunt in order to survive. Heck, you hated eating animals, but you did it anyway because you needed to eat.

The same could be said for ghouls.

Speaking of ghouls, you had encountered one after you came across her hunting. Of course, she almost killed you, but when she realized you weren't doing anything except staring at her, she seemed confused, but you couldn't tell. Facial expressions and body language were not your specialty anyway, though you were able to read a little to get by. 

The ghoul's kagune, a piece of art in itself, caught your attention, and you stared at it in wonder, wanting to touch it, but at the same time wondering if it would burn you.

"Pretty," you whispered.

The girl's eyes widened, and she stared at you like you were an alien. You blinked at her as she disappeared, leaving you alone in the alleyway.

Since then, you had been trying to find her, and your search lead you to Anteiku, a coffee shop located in the 20th ward.

It was hard living in Tokyo, where so many things overwhelmed you: the smell of the cars, the loud bustle of the people, the people pushing into you, and even the other aromas in the air was stiffing. You had stopped at Anteiku to get started on your homework like you always did on Saturdays. As soon as you went in, you could practically feel the tension in the air, and you almost choked.

As a result, you looked up to see the same ghoul, who in return stared at you, stiff. You blinked at her again, before pointing at her and said, "Pretty."

The girl stared at you weirdly. "U-Um...thank you, now do you want a booth or table?"

"T-Table p-please..." you stammered, soon quietly going after the girl. As soon as you were seated, you started to work on your math, which helped you ignore the world around you.

Of course, you weren't aware of this, but the waitress was staring at your paper like it would catch fire if she turned away. The mathematics you were working on were unlike the ones she was learning, and you were going at it like tomorrow was never coming. Eventually, you lost room on your paper and moved to write the equations on another one.

And, that was how you came to become friends with the ghouls of Anteiku.

It took a while for them though to realize you were autistic, as most of them hadn't heard of it before, and you were hoping to keep it that way. However, life somehow said "Oh no you don't" and decided to mean to you one time.

It wasn't like you were at fault though, right? You hated sharing because people would mess up your things, which resulted in complete freak outs on your end. The victim of one of these freak outs was Nishiki, who thought it would be funny to mismatch your notebooks. As soon as you saw the unorganized way of your notebooks, you went ballistic.

You started screaming, chasing after Nishiki and slapping him over and over in the face. Now, as he wasn't expecting this reaction from you, Nishiki was quite helpless to defend himself as you mercilessly attacked his face.

"How dare you!" you screamed. "I hate you I hate you I HATE YOU!!"

"What's--(Y/N), what are you doing now?" Mr. Yoshimura rushed to get you off of Nishiki, but he then had to result to using his kagune to gently hold you away from the ghoul. In the meantime, you screamed and clawed at your binding, tears streaming down your cheeks. While keeping you at bay, Mr. Yoshimura glared at Nishiki. "What did you do?"

"Nothing! I just reorganized (Y/N)'s notebooks, and she freaked out on me!"

Mr. Yoshimura looked between you and Nishiki, unsure of what to do with the both of you. Just then Touka, who just arrived after hearing the commotion, told her boss. "I think (Y/N)'s an autistic."

Mentally, Touka was thanking Mr. Yoshimura and her coworkers for suggesting she go to school, because that also involved learning a bit about psychological disorders and other different wiring of the brain, and autism happened to be among them.

Yoshimura and Nishiki glanced at Touka in question, and she explained the signs and the characteristics of autism. Meanwhile, you were slumped on Mr. Yoshimura's kagune, and he gently placed you on the floor.

"I see, so now that you know that Nishiki, please refrain from doing that again," Yoshimura warned the younger man, who gulped and nodded.

You, on the other hand, didn't know whether to feel shocked or grateful that Touka already knew the signs without you having to tell her.

Days later, and you had learned to readjust to your new schedule as a cook in Anteiku, as you couldn't handle talking with the customers. Besides, cooking helped keep your hands busy, and you made sure to cook depending on who the customer was, with you making sure to keep the human food away from your coworkers and the other ghoul customers. Speaking of your coworkers and the customers, they were quite impressed when they saw the artwork you made of the food, and actually looked disappointed when they had to destroy it.

One day though, you developed a new employee, a boy named Kaneki Ken.

You remembered seeing him in Anteiku with another boy (Hide right?) but now you noticed he had an eye-patch over one eye. Did something happen? Mr. Yoshimura, against your will, decided to introduce you to him as soon as he got the job, and stared at you hard to ensure you wouldn't misbehave.

As the man was terrifying when he was angry, you couldn't say no.

"Ah, Kaneki, there you are!" Yoshimura greeted as he gently guided you to the table. You kept your eyes averted, wishing you were back in the kitchen, but you stopped thinking that when you heard your boss continue. "May I introduce you to (Y/N) (L/N), she's been wanting to meet you."

You snapped your head up at Yoshimura, but he either ignored you or didn't notice.

"U-Um...hello," Kaneki greeted, offering you his hand. Reluctantly, you nodded and placed your hand in his, but immediately snatched it away and dashed back the kitchen. Seeing this, Yoshimura sighed and turned to a confused Kaneki.

"Please excuse (Y/N), I'm afraid she's not used to greeting people, especially new employees."

Kaneki, however, didn't seem to hear him, mostly because he was running a marathon in his mind with questions, like how a human was here alongside ghouls.

Afterwards, you felt terrible for running off like that, so you made a treat for Kaneki, made of course with human meat, but you wouldn't tell him that, as, according to Touka, he had recently been turned into an artificial one-eyed ghoul and was in denial over it. You found him sitting at one of the empty tables, lost in thought. Quietly, you stood in front of him, startling him.

"Oh, I-I'm sorry. I didn't see you there," Kaneki said, bashfully rubbing his cheek.

Unsure of how to approach this, you made a small smile and presented the treat. Kaneki blinked at it, and you clarified, "For you."

Understanding now, the black-haired boy took the treat and stared at it in displeasure, probably realizing it was made of human meat. You bit your lip, wondering if you did something wrong, and Kaneki, seeing this, hurriedly smiled at you.

"I-It's beautiful! Don't worry!" Hearing this, you beamed, squealing a little and clapping your hands.

Meanwhile, Kaneki was struggling to not unleash a sound at this. _So cute._


	2. The Girl With a Brave Heart

You had been writing math equations all over the walls (with Mr. Yoshimura's permission of course), just lost in your own world full of numbers, when they came.

There was one thing that you hated being, and it was useless. When you saw Kaneki being tossed around like a rag doll by like large, terrifying ghoul, you were caught between whimpering and giving yourself away, or protecting Kaneki to the best of your ability.

You decided to go with the latter.

"(Y/N)! What are you--" Kaneki couldn't finish as you stepped in front of his bloody form, the smell of the blood overwhelming you, but you ignored it as you shielded Kaneki.

The ghoul raised an amused eyebrow. "What's this?" he asked. "A human? Well then, what are you going to do little girl?"

You didn't answer. Instead you stared hard up at him.

This time he laughed. "Protecting him are you? How sweet." Then, before you had time to react, he slapped you aside, and you faintly heard the sound of bones snapping. Then, you landed none too gently on a nearby table.

"(Y/N)!" Kaneki screamed, struggling to reach for you, but the ghoul stopped him.

You whimpered in pain, but you forced yourself to work yourself towards Kaneki and the ghoul, ignoring the pain as you went. The ghoul noticed this, and smirked at your slow progress.

"So you have this little human wrapped around your finger Kaneki? How romantic. I wonder what would happen if I rip her to pieces before your eyes?"

"You stay away from her!" Kaneki shouted, enraged, but then he felt you tug on his sleeve. Looking down at you, he watched as you attempted to stand up and defend him, but the pain was clearly too much for you, because you had a hard time doing it on your own.

The ghoul rolled his eyes. "You're becoming annoying little girl." Then he grabbed you by the throat, causing a pained yelp to escape from you.

"No!"

You didn't understand what happened next, but next thing you knew you were on the glass covered ground, trying not to move. Moving meant asking the pain to come back, and that was the last thing you wanted.

But you had to find Kaneki.

Shakily, you reached out an arm, trying to ignore the glass shards, when you felt a familiar hand grasp yours. Turning your head, you saw Kaneki, whose wounds appeared to have healed and who glanced at you with worry. You tried to smile, but even that was too much for you, and you flinched in response.

"Y-You idiot, why did you do that?" Kaneki whispered to you.

You just whimpered in response, unsure of how to answer. You knew that you wanted to protect him from that ghoul, but you didn't know how to explain yourself. In response to this, Kaneki just gently held your hand, trying to soothe you.

All the while you were cursing your inability to do anything.

Sadly for you, it got worse from there, especially when you heard Kaneki had been kidnapped by Aogiri Tree.

You never felt so much worry and rage in your life, and, against Anteiku's wishes, you went to their hideout alone, somehow managing to outtake the ghouls that guarded the building. You found Kaneki alright, but what you saw made you hate yourself more.

Kaneki was screaming like no other, and that disgusting ghoul was causing all that pain to him. Before you could stop yourself, you found yourself running to him, screaming yourself.

Kaneki jerked after hearing your voice, and the ghoul turned towards you, an annoyed but amused grin on his face.

"Well well, what do we have here?" he asked, stalking towards you, but you were too busy trying to get to Kaneki to feel any fear. Before you could touch him though, you were grabbed and pinned to a wall, with something being forced through your hands and feet.

You couldn't stifle a pained gasp when you realized your mistake.

"Yamori!" Kaneki screamed in rage. Faintly, you could hear him trying to free himself from his binds.

The ghoul, Yamori, ignored him as he watched your pained form. "You either are really brave or really stupid for coming here girl, but I must say, you look like a dying goddess, with your beauty withering away as you fade." He then tilted your chin up. "Tell me my dear, do you truly love this boy that much that you would happily die for him?"

You didn't hesitate to answer, despite the pain. "Yes."

Yamori's eyes widened, but then he grinned. "Well then, I'm afraid your efforts were in vain in the end. Now you can watch as your boyfriend becomes my toy, all while you die from blood loss."

If you didn't die from exhaustion first.

Before you lost consciousness, you faintly saw Kaneki's black hair become white.

~~~

Someone was approaching you, and this made you open your eyes. Looking up, you saw Kaneki, covered in blood and so different from the Kaneki you knew. Either way, you felt no fear, especially when you felt the worry ebbing off him. Nearby, you found the mangled body of Yamori.

The only thing you could do for Kaneki was give him a weak smile.

Then, he began to pull the knives from her palms and feet, the pain making you cry out. Kaneki then caught your falling body, keeping you close to his chest.

"I...I'm so sorry...Kaneki," was all you could say to him. You hated that you were so weak, unable to protect the ones you cherished.

Kaneki said nothing to this, but he gently lifted your broken body into his arms, moving your head so it was resting on his chest. You didn't protest, knowing it would be foolish. As Kaneki carried you to the roof, you heard him whisper, "No (Y/N), _I'm_ sorry."

Apparently you lost consciousness again, because the first thing you saw was a night sky and Kaneki staring at someone.

"Kaneki," someone quietly called. It took you a moment to realize it was Nishiki.

"Don't worry I'm fine. Take (Y/N)." He gently handed you over to Nishiki, who then proceeded to see to your wounds.

As he was doing this, he glared at you. "You fucking idiot. What the hell were you thinking?!"

You flinched, mostly because of the pain. Once you were sure you could talk, you whispered, "I just...wanted to help."

"You could've helped by staying safe."

"But..."

"Look (Y/N), I know how much you care for us, and we're happy about that, but do you think we would be happy if you died?"

You didn't answer.

"Thought so, now stay quiet. This is going to be a while."

As you felt Nishiki examining your wounds, everything went black once more.

~~~

Back at Anteiku, Kaneki placed your unconscious form in a nearby booth seat, allowing Touka, Mr. Yoshimura, and Hinami to care for you from there.

"I treated her wounds as best as I could, but she's lost a lot of blood and her muscles are badly strained. What happened Kaneki?" Nishiki asked, glancing suspiciously at the boy beside him.

Kaneki's mind flashed to you screaming, rushing over to him in an attempt to save him, but then Yamori grabbed you and cruelly crucified you to the wall, so beautiful it disturbed Kaneki. Now he wished that he could kill Yamori all over again.

During his time at Anteiku, you helped show him that not all ghouls were evil, and how at ease you were with him. You clearly didn't care if ghouls had to kill people in order to survive, and this confused Kaneki at first.

"Ghouls are like predators in the wild," you explained. "They can't eat plants to survive, only meat, and ghouls are the same."

Kaneki never thought of it that way. He guessed that was why he was so attached to you.

And just...seeing you in pain because of him sent a ruthless chill up his spine. He couldn't protect you as you were beaten to a pulp and tortured. He was supposed to be the one protecting you, not the other way around.

Now, his decision had been made.


	3. The Girl Who Loves Fiercely

"I'm worried," Touka suddenly brought up one day. She glanced at you, watching as you quietly poked at your meal, all while you occasionally looked up to the seat across from you.

"What is it Touka?" Mr. Yoshimura asked, before he followed Touka's eyes to you. His face shifted into a frown as he understood.

"(Y/N)'s been doing this for weeks now," Touka began, worrying her lower lip. "I get that she and Kaneki were extremely close, but this is ridiculous."

Even during the weeks you were recovering from your wounds, you tried to continue on with your normal routine like nothing had happened. You cooked, did your math, and even ate across the seat where you would sit across from Kaneki as the both of you ate. Hell, even in front of the seat you were looking at, you placed a plate that contained human meat and a cup of hot coffee, the food that Kaneki would usually eat.

Of course, secretly, the other employees would serve the food to other customers or eat it themselves so it wouldn't spoil.

"Touka, you should understand why (Y/N)'s doing this," Mr. Yoshimura replied, staring hard at the younger girl. "You told us yourself that she's extremely loyal to those who are either friends or lovers with her, and it's clear that she took Kaneki's departure worse than any of us."

"I know, but..."

"I'm worried too Touka, but I'm afraid there's no stopping her. You told us that yourself."

Touka didn't reply to that, knowing the old man was right. It wasn't a secret that those on the autism spectrum were stereotypically loyal to their friends and lovers. You happened to be one of them. She always saw how loyal you were in the beginning of your friendship with Kaneki, who in turn clearly enjoyed your company immensely. Then as the weeks passed, the feelings the two of you had for each other became something more. Touka saw it the day Aogiri raided Anteiku.

You were willing to suffer in order to protect someone you cared for, and Touka had the idea that was why Kaneki left to begin with, and she didn't need to be told to know that he had been deeply disturbed whenever you got hurt because of him.

Did that mean he left to protect you?

She may never know.

~~~

The full moon was out tonight, so you watched it from your apartment as you quietly wrote in your notebook. It was hard though, because your hands still hurt a little from your failed attempt of rescuing Kaneki from Aogiri.

The thought of Kaneki sent a wave of pain to your heart. You didn't know what happened after you lost consciousness during Kaneki's fight with Touka's brother Ayato Kirishima, but when you woke up in a bed at Anteiku, Kaneki was gone. He just...left, without telling you goodbye.

That somehow hurt more than the pain in your hands and feet.

So, you kept with your routine, hoping that he would come back, but after many weeks, he never did.

That didn't stop you though. This routine you developed with Kaneki gave you a sense of peace and belonging, and you didn't want it to change.

You continued to watch the city go on by without a thought. You lived in one of the upper areas in Tokyo, which gave you almost a full view of the entire city. You moved here not only because of the view, but because it was cheap. And sure the apartment you lived in was small, but it suited you perfectly. Best of all, your neighbors were very polite towards you and didn't bother you much.

An ideal place for a person like you.

The night breeze was comforting too, and a light breeze came through your open window and sent your hair flying a little. You closed your notebook at this point so your papers wouldn't go flying as you continued to watch the night zoom on by. You closed your eyes, imagining you were bathing in the moonlight and disappearing from the world, until you heard something a little out of place.

Opening your eyes, a flash of white zoomed by. Confused, you stumbled all the way to the window, looking around on the balcony. You found nothing, so you just closed the window.

It was probably just your imagination after all.

~~~

Something was touching you, gentle, loving. You found yourself opening your eyes tiredly, your vision blurred from sleep, but you were able to make out white hair. You blinked, wondering why you didn't feel scared that someone was in your home.

However, you had a good idea of who this person was.

"Kane...ki?" you whispered tiredly.

A finger gently pecked your lips, and you flinched a little. The boy above you didn't say a word, but you knew he acknowledged what you said. He leaned down towards you, and you then felt something wet and soft touch your neck. You shivered, wondering what this boy was doing to you.

You didn't fight back however when he slowly but gently removed your nightshirt. You shivered from the cold that bit at your skin, but didn't complain as the boy got under the covers with you, now no longer wearing any clothing of his own.

You found yourself blushing despite yourself. You didn't know why this didn't bother you as much as you thought it would, but this boy made you feel safe, something that only Kaneki was able to do. You automatically knew it was him.

He took one of your hands and seemed to examine the scar that now ran through your palm before placing a light kiss on it. By now you were trying not to tense, as electric shocks were zooming through your body without your consent.

"I'm sorry," a smooth, elegant, and beautifully masculine voice whispered in your ear, and you were surprised that you eyes stung a little from that sound alone.

"For what?" you asked back. Then you understood, and you sighed. "Kaneki, I knew what I was getting myself into when I came to rescue you. Don't blame yourself for my own mistakes, because I went in there without thinking and put myself in danger. But remember this; these scars remind me of the time I tried to help you and almost succeeded."

Kaneki said nothing, and you were aware he didn't need to. Instead, he rolled on top on you, keeping his lips near the skin of your neck. You almost jerked, as his breath and the whisper of his lips were sending shock waves through your body. However, what was really making you about to go crazy was the touch of something near your womanhood.

Now, you weren't the kind of person who was experienced in the ways of sexual pleasure, given that you've never had a boyfriend before. For a moment you were embarrassed with yourself. However, the worry of what was to come overcame that feeling.

"Be gentle, please," you whispered.

And so he did.

He softly placed his lips on your neck, licking and sucking, causing your vision to already go white. Though, apparently this was a distraction, so you felt something slowly entering you from below, and you gasped out at the feeling.

At first it really hurt, but then a feeling that you never felt before overcame you, and you found yourself gasping for more. Hearing this, Kaneki seemed to smirk against your skin and pushed deeper and harder into you, and this time you did cry out.

"Kaneki!" you cried, both a plea and a scolding, you didn't know. Kaneki just chuckled against you, and for a moment, you thought of him as a mischievous child. In response to this, you fingered his white hair and roughly pulled him away from your neck. He groaned, both in pain and disappointment, but when he saw you pouting up at him, his smirk returned, and he continued to dig into your delicate skin and thrust himself into you.

Each time you cried out, unable to control yourself. You were aware that tears were stinging your eyes and you were hyperventilating, but you couldn't bring yourself to care at all, which came as a shock to you, so when Kaneki ejected himself, you whined.

He smiled down at you. "Turn over," he ordered. Desperate, you did as you were told. "Now, lift your ass up."

You did.

Just as you thought the suspense would kill you, Kaneki injected a finger into your core. You gave a quiet whimper, wishing he wouldn't tease you so, but you forced yourself to appreciate what he was giving you. You shuddered when Kaneki's finger began to caress your insides, making it impossible for you to take deep breaths.

"M-More..." you whispered.

"What was that?" Kaneki asked you huskily.

"Please, more! Give me more!" you begged before you could stop yourself.

You didn't need to look at Kaneki to know he was smiling. "Of course." Then he brought out his finger and replaced it with with his manhood.

You were unable to suppress a cry of complete pleasure at this. It was so amazing that you couldn't even make any other sound, and you were also vaguely aware that Kaneki was in the same predicament as you. You clung to your bed-sheets, surprised that you weren't ripping at the fabric. But then again you never allowed your nails to grow longer because of the fact that you chew on them more times than you dared to admit.

You shuddered when you felt hands grabbing at your breasts, caressing the tips and sending sparks through you. "Scream for me," Kaneki whispered into your ear. You breathed shakily, wanting so badly to do as he asked. But then he clutched at the mounds of your breasts, and you couldn't stop yourself.

"Please Kaneki! Please!" you yelled out, inwardly hoping no one could hear you.

You were tugging at anything you could get your hands on by now; the sheets, the bedpost, the wall, just anything to help with the turmoil you were feeling. This was torture, you swear that it's torture, and Kaneki was being sadistic right now. He was doing this on purpose!

"Tell me (Y/N), how much do you want me?" Kaneki asked, grinning down at you.

You couldn't answer, mostly because you lost any ability of how to speak. That must've been a good enough answer for the white-haired ghoul, because he turned your over and brought himself with you. He caressed your face, your lips, your eyelids, and even your ears. Seconds later, he ran his lips over each one, making you sigh in content.

All the while he was staying inside you, where the both of you were content with having a quiet release.

"Now, it's your turn. Pleasure me," Kaneki ordered.

Blushing like a tomato, you worked yourself on top of Kaneki, worried that you weren't going to do as he requested good enough. Uncertainly, like you've heard some girls do, you use your vaginal walls to crush the object that was inside you, and Kaneki hissed. You forced yourself to not pay attention to that, instead focusing on doing your absolute best in what you were doing.

Maybe Kaneki could teach you a thing or two about this.

But even you knew these moments wouldn't last forever, so both you and Kaneki decided to savor what you've already got, because apparently Kaneki had to leave you again, and for a moment your heart beat with a familiar sorrow that you've felt all these past weeks.

"Remember I love you," Kaneki whispered into your ear. "Always remember that little bird."

Those words allowed you to fall asleep without any fears.

By the time you woke up the next morning, you knew Kaneki had left. However, you didn't feel sad this time, for by this did you realize something.

You would always wait for him, no matter how long it took. Even if it took months, years, or even decades, you would always wait for him.

You were, after all, Kaneki Ken's little bird.


End file.
